I'm just gonna run right through the rain, I'm just gonna dance right through the pain.

Okay so currently I'm addicted to Louder by Charice. The melody is so catchy. Let my heart speak louder than my head head head head...

So I found out today that, THE FARM THAT MY AUNT OWNS IN CHINA IS GONE! Not gone gone, but like, upgraded or something. The cows, chickens, horses, tractors, wheel-carts (okay I'm joking about the cows and the horse) are all gone! Apparently they upgraded to those higher tech machines, which makes me really sad because I wanted to drive the tractors! The last time I went back I was 13, so my aunt refused, saying that I was too young and I might squash all her plants D: I'M OLDER NOW BUT HER TRACTOR IS GONE. *inside sad face here* My dad says that if I'm lucky I might get to ride a motorcycle since there are no roads there, just sand and mud and more sand, so no one is going to care if I have no driving license (provided that I don't kill someone). Most probably I'm just going to learn, but not really ride it, I think I might really knock into someone if I did. But apparently I'm really going to go back to the big house where I used to go back to (Its like the size of half a soccer field but with no roads, no internet, no computers and their toilet is the non-flusher-ble kind) because we'll be going to some new house that my cousin bought. I'm going to say I will forever love the old house even though its... old and inaccessible (I think I used to go there by bicycles) because ITS SO HUGE AND SCARY. I swear we could have filmed a horror story inside HAHAHAHA. Its really creepy at night (but quite shuang because we can just lay down in the center of the house where there's a field that was used to rear chickens and look at the stars) because there is no light at the stairs to the 2nd floor (when I was young I was so freaked out by it that I refused to go up to the 2nd floor even during daytime, and when my mum convinced me to go up there I was still spooked by the atmosphere up there) Thinking about it now, ITS SO COOL. I CAN HAVE MY OWN CHALET THERE CAN. And to eat we all have to go to the nearby fields to steal people's vegetables HAHAHAHA. 

I went to Wanxinyi's house to play with her cats, and I specially wore this dress with cats on it so that her cats will be less scared of me. Her cats were still under her bed most of the time, avoiding me D: I thought that since I'm a cat person this year, cats will be a Zeling person this year too (LOL i know this is crap but i thought that cats would be nicer to me) BUT THEY RAN AWAY FROM ME. I MEAN IF THEY IGNORED ME ITS OKAY BUT THEY RAN AWAY FROM ME. HOW MEAN IS THAT!!! I still want a cat though. Hehe. When I can afford a house on my own, I'm going to adopt a kitten, a puppy, 2 hamsters and a parrot! This way they won't be lonely when I'm working or sleeping (: My mum says I'm crazy, considering I can't even keep myself alive HAHAHAHAHA. BUT I STILL WANT TO DO IT. 

I still haven't gotten my acceptance letter, and I'm starting to freak out already. I know they said we will get to know around mid-May, BUT WHY SO MANY PEOPLE GET THEIR LETTERS ALREADY!?!? It's like O levels all over again, we were suppose to receive a sms telling us which school we got accepted to by 8am, but by 7am most of my friends got their sms already, and by 7.30am almost everyone I knew knew where they were sorted to. EXCEPT FOR ME. I can't remember who called who but I talked to one of my friends and he had also received his school, and told me that I could actually check it online. So I checked (meanwhile I was panicking that maybe no schools wanted me because of certain reasons LOL) and I found out lah. I received the sms at around 8.15am, WHEN ALL MY FRIENDS RECEIVED AT 7.30AM. WHY. SERIOUSLY SOMEONE UP THERE REALLY HATES ME ALOT. AND NOW MOST OF THEM GOT THEIR LETTERS TO EEE & BUSINESS AND I GOT NOTHING. Its not that I'm not happy for them, but I APPLIED EARLIER THAN THEM LEH. SHOULDN'T I BE THE ONE THATS JUMPING UP AND DOWN FOR JOY BEFORE THEM? Okay I shall stop complaining because we applied for different courses, and I applied for the more competitive courses LOL so I can't really blame them lah horh.

I called Yow earlier, and started ranting to her about uni apps, without knowing that she's at the airport heading towards TAIWAN. JEALOUS. JEALOUS. Anyway you have to understand that I'm supposed to be on this flight as well, except for the fact that, well, my dad didn't approve of it because there's no adults on this trip.

Me: Daddy, you know just now who I was talking to?

Dad: No, who?

Me: My friend lorh. She's at the airport. Know where she's going to?

Dad: No, where? 

Me: Taiwan. And I'm supposed to be there as well, but someone didn't allow me to go. *Sigh*

*Dad & Mum laughs* 

Me: I could be happily on the plane now, heading towards TAIWAN! Then HK, which I always dreamed of going to. I haven't even been to ShangHai! (My parents went to Shanghai before they were married) But instead, I'm here now, being bored out of mind, and dragging both of you to Fairprice Extra to shop at 12am. I could be be shopping in Taiwan tmr!

*Dad & Mum laughs*

Dad: And your money would have been all gone by tomorrow. Oh wait, did I say your money? I meant MY money. *laughs*

Me: *Sigh* I pity myself. While both of you have been to so many parts of China and SHANGHAI, I've only been to XiAn & ShanXi (my parent's hometown). *Sigh* You know I've always wanted to go to Taiwan!

Dad: *Sigh* I pity myself, I've always wanted to go to Cambodia! While I've only been to US countless times for business meetings, you went to Cambodia on your own! (I went there for OCIP) How could you do this to me! Don't you know that it's my dream to go to Cambodia?!?!?

Mum: *says jokingly* Stop pitying yourself! You've been to Korea!

Me: We just stopped over at Seoul on our way back from US! That's not counted! *Sighs*

Dad: Well, I don't care, since you abandoned your old man and ran to Cambodia to enjoy, I'm not going to let you do it again! If I can't go to Taiwan, so can't you! I have only so much money for you to spend! 

*Dad & Mum laughs while I SIGHHHHH*

Okay so I wasn't really pitying myself, I know that my parents are really good to me, because I really went to alot of places before haha. I just said that to joke with my dad. And my dad doesn't want to go to Cambodia, he doesn't even count travelling in Asia as a holiday, because we are Asians so we should holiday in Europe or somewhere HAHAHA he has such weird logic. Come to think of it, maybe the reason why I have weird logic too is because of genetics HAHAHAHA. Its not a bad thing really. You can probably tell by all my posts, the random and no-link topics hahahahaha.

Okay its 2.22am now, I shld probably sleep. So... Goodnight.

Recently I've become obsessed with a Hong Kong actor, Hawick Lau 刘恺威. He's 33 years old this year I think, which makes me sad D: Why are all the cute actors all so old!!! 

I was just randomly watching videos on Youtube when I came across this trailer of a show which had him as a male lead, Spell of the Fragrance, and somehow his face just stuck to me HAHA. So after watching the trailer many many many times (I was trying to remember where I saw him before, his face was just so familiar), I remembered that HE APPEARED IN MY DREAM BEFORE! When I was in sec4 I guess? Once I had a dream that I was in an amusement park and I was crying beside the entrance of the Merry-Go-Round ride (the scene was exactly the same as Stairway to Heaven). As to why I cried I guess it was partially because even though I've always wanted to go to this amusement park (and its really beautiful, just go watch Stairway to Heaven), everyone seems to be having fun except for me, and I was... Lonely? How do I explain this feeling... Its not like my friends left me there, they asked me to join in, but there's still this loneliness feeling to everything. Like I could feel that the people riding all the rides are actually unhappy, even though they're laughing. So in my mind I was thinking Its not supposed to be like that! Everyone is supposed to be happy! I'm supposed to be happy! Stop feeling sad! Why are you all feeling sad? But when I asked them, all they do is smile and invite me to join them on their rides. Its like I'm there, but I'm not there. So I told them I didn't dare to sit the rides and walked aimlessly around, trying to figure out why everyone is upset in such a magical place, and when I reach the Merry-Go-Round I couldn't take it anymore and started crying.

And then he walked up to me (GAW he looked as though he was 22 years old and I was 16 or something and it was snowing!) and patted me on my head and told me not to cry. I continued crying, and he just hugged me (in a soothing way not the romantic way) and patted me gently on my back till I finished crying, and he held my hand and started walking towards somewhere (I forgot lol) and he told me that he's going to bring me to a place where nobody's sad, so I can stop being sad for them. At that moment I couldn't feel other people's sadness anymore, I just felt very calm and glad that nobody's feeling sad anymore.

THEN MY ALARM CLOCK WOKE ME UP AND IT WAS TIME TO GET READY FOR SCHOOL. 

Anyway I would say it was a pretty horrible dream (at the front, almost like a nightmare), but it got better towards the end. But I didn't know who he was, all I know is that he appeared in some TV show that I saw before, I don't even know his name! 

So I got really excited after I knew that HE WAS THE GUY IN MY DREAM and I went to google him, thats when I realised that YES I DID WATCH HIM IN A SHOW BEFORE. AND THE SHOW IS 真情!!! I remember watching this show when I was young because my mum was such a huge fan of it. Every weekday at 7pm Channel 8 would start showing this drama and my mum would just sit there and watch, for like duno how months to years. I'm not sure what part he played in this drama, but I'm pretty sure that was the first time I saw him (and i was thinking this boy so cute) HAHAHA. Even though everything's so blurry because I was so young then heh. Oh well, I guess maybe he didn't want to lose me as a fan so he came into my dreams HAHAHAHAHA. 

Anyway I think I'm quite lucky, alot of Taiwan and Hong Kong actors and singers appeared in my dreams before HAHAHAHA. So according to some psychological 'fact' (When you dream of someone, that person is thinking of you), Mike He, Show Luo, Hawick Lau, Joe Ma, Kelvin Cheng, Ethan Ruan JinTian, Hebe Tian all thought of me once ah. HAHAHA WAHHH Okay I'm such an important person (:

Ohkay actually I think all those dreams can be considered as lucid dreaming, but I didn't know what was lucid dreaming then and I wasn't really in control of the dream. But more on that next time. 

P.S Do not even attempt to watch ZhenQing. IT HAS LIKE OVER 1000 EPISODES YOU WILL WATCH UNTIL YOU CRAZY. Although I don't mimnd if they start showing it on Channel 8 though. I'll be its loyal fan (: